Chalke Valley v SUCC 5th XI on Sun 06 May 2018 at 16:00
SUCC Won By 9 Wickets

Match report Remembering Legends, past and present.

9 brave bastions of wessex struggled to the 8am meet time on a beautiful Sunday morning for what would turn out to be a memorable and historic day for the club. Meeting the rest of the squad at Sherborne, we set off for the inaugural Alexander Kwiatkowski Memorial Tournament between Chalke Valley CC, an Old Sherbornian XI, and SUCC. Before I continue, I should say thanks to Ryan Gullock for his efforts in organising the day, a top effort mate, thank you!

Early yips on winding roads from veteran Stansfield, and tight manoeuvres in the maccies car park filled the bulk of the entertainment on the 2 hour journey to Sherborne. Some cracking calls in a game of architecture wife and we were there, just in time to find out we were watching Sherborne and Chalke Valley in the first game. The boys took in much of the beautiful sights on the Sherborne upper, excited on seeing a clear blue sky, a lovely day and a hard deck. Cricket was here and there was not a cloud in sight to bring that dreaded rain that has hamstrung our season so far. Chalke played the Old Boys in the first game, with wessex old boy Calcott playing for Sherborne. Not much of note happened in the first game, bar a return to regular form with Calcs bullying a sunday attack on his way to a well made 49, only for the fastest gun slinger in the west A.Stansfield to whip out his magnum 45 and trigger the shit out of poor old Calcs, 1 short of 50.

Following a short break and turn around SUCC were in the field for game 2 of the day against Chalke Valley. A crowd was gathering in the bank holiday sunshine in anticipation for a wessex masterclass. We took the field with ten, with Cuddles stuck at home having acquired a flat (fat) tyre, missing the 10am meet at Sherborne. Nonetheless, spirit was on our side, and that wessex buzz, with Kwaz in everyone’s memory, 10 felt like 11, as we started well. Bantock, heading back to a school for the first time since Maggie Thatcher was in office, and Sinead O’Conner lookalike Mossie, took the new ball, bowling tight and offering few run scoring chances to the chalke valley team. Many funny things happened in the field on this special day, excellence and idiocy abound. This can be encapsulated in one moment, in our new “Strongbow Dark Fruits Moment of the Day” (extreme opposite of champagne). This went to Will Brisco, standing at short extra, executed an excellent diving stop off of a rocket of a drive from Bantock, as he tumbled and twisted to cling on to the ball, there was a brief run out chance, so Bris chanced his arm. Finding himself in a position on his arse, legs akimbo high up in the air, Bris hurls the ball with a ferocity we are all familiar to (see winchester at home in the 2s last year where he hit the kneecap of the umpire). Unfortunately the ball struck his outstretched foot, almost bicycle kicking the ball from the ground out to the cover sweeper.

Spin from both ends followed as Cam and I came on. This middle overs gribble was followed by one solitary over of full tosses from Jamie Poil, one of many that day. This was followed by a su-perb death bowling combination of young and old, Advait (bowling leg breaks) and Stanners. Both taking 3 fers in a superb spell, consisting of both being on a hat trick ball. Advait chiming in with an exceptional spell, culminating in a rude caught and bowled. This left SUCC chasing 137 to win.

Brisco and Groves opened up, finding the going very comfortable with a series of elegant cuts and pulls on the great deck. A great day for batting and both batsmen cashed in, Groves retiring for a well made 50, SUCC putting on 100-0! How often can you say that! Advait came in to claim the winning runs, slapping the ball over cover leaving Brisco 49 red in the chase!

(Advait 3-0-9-3, Stanners 4-0-32-4/Groves 50*, Brisco 49*, Advait 15*)

Speeches and tea followed shortly as the drinks kept flowing and the sun climbed into the afternoon sky. The afternoon game brought the much awaited clash between the Old Boys and SUCC, and with SUCC batting first Jordan and Stanners strode to the crease, following severe pad rash in the last game. For the second time in the same day SUCC found ourselves 100-0! Stanners and Jor-dan batted fluently to bring up their century partnership, Jords retiring on 50, stansfield falling for a well made 22. The middle order struggled for fluency on a good deck, calcott delivering his predict-able right arm assorted gribble. This was all too much for a certain notts 2s legend and veteran of SUCC Jake Fish, pushing forward and placing his bat where he shouldn't have, leading to the vital nick and well earned send off. Cam and I gribbled around in the middle struggling to find the bound-ary as per, before we both fell for 9. Poil came and went without troubling the scorers for a golden, a mark of the man’s day to come. A man in a linen shirt doing the bulk of the damage. SUCC fin-ished their innings on 134 from their 20 overs. A respectable total however very much in reach on an excellent batting wicket with the may sunshine perforating the day.

SUCC took the field eager for one wicket and one wicket only, that of old boy calcs, fresh from stealing the wicket of Fishy. However a return to the Calculator we know and love, falling LBW to mossie for 0, thanks bud. SUCC made early inroads into the Sherborne batting, and it was looking like a very easy with for the university stalwarts, and the Old Sherbornians amassing a huge 18/2 from the power play. We turned to spin early, in the form of self professed leg spinner JGJ McLeod, who swiftly switched to off spin after 2 balls (bouncing a sum total of 4 times). 2 Wickets for myself and 1 for cameron through the middle stemmed the flow of the chase and victory seemed certain. It must be noted that cam got hit for the biggest six I’ve seen in a while (not a patch on Sean Bob vs Fish 2016), by a batsman who was nice and relaxed at the crease due to the help of a pre innings zoot. If ever it was a time for a hero, it was now, and Poil and Groves proceeded to be that hero… for the opposition. Poil landing one delivery out of his “12”, and if this weren't a me-morial game, would most definitely have been banned for intimidatory bowling. Groves not proving much better with his paul adams impression “frog in a blender” bowling action.

Fish grabbed the ball to swing the game in our favour and things began to happen, strange things in the field. Firstly, Cam, fielding deep square leg, and opting to sweep on both boundaries due to his proximity to his beer, came charging in for what looked like a regulation catch at deep square leg. Upon realising the ball was traveling a lot faster than first anticipated, he promptly put the breaks on, and his legs didn't want to stop. The result was 4 runs, and Cameron lying flat on his arse. But to top it off, 2 in 2 balls Jamie Poil managed to find his way to mid on, another lofted shot saw him charge in, charge out, charge in again, and the ball to sail over his head before bouncing. Followed by an-other ball going straight up and Fish telling him to “fuck off its mine”, but was unable to get there.

The game got to its final over, Sherborne 8 down with one man retired, and the state of play was 7 to win. Who else but Jake Fish to bowl the last. And first ball he did it, a wicket! LBW. This brought their in form man to the crease. Next ball he ran straight past a tweaker from Jakey, only to see the umpire not give him out clearly stumped. Might've been the day, might've been the beer. But this decision turned out to be a masterstroke, as the game in honour of our great mate ended in a tie!

A fitting way to end a fantastic day! We then headed down to the pub with the oppo and the Kwiat-koski family, where the beers flowed and stories were exchanged long into the night. I even man-aged to attract the attention of one of the local females. Albeit she had 4 teeth and wasn't speaking english, but beggars cant be choosers.

Thank you very much to Miranda, Damien, and Laura Kwiatkowski, without whom this day would not be possible, and to Sherborne school, the old boys and Chalke Valley for making it a special day. A word must be said for Ryan Gullock, organising the day but was unable to attend. He will always have next year as we hope to grow this day into something even more special. Raising £400 for cricket united was the easiest of our jobs on the day and thank you everyone for your generosity. It is a day I will never forget and I’m sure you all feel the same. Hopefully next year will be bigger and better!

MOM - Advait, Jordan
DOD - Fat Cuddles
Shoes - Bantock (x2), Groves, Cameron, Poil (x2)


AR x

Chalke Valley Batting
Player name RunsMB4s6sSR
4nb 17w 1lb 
for 7 wickets
136 (20.0 overs)
M.Mallinson Retired Out  53
J.Weld lbw  M.Perry 9
W.Fortesave b  A.Stansfield 27
H.Hitchings ct  A.Stansfield 2
T.Mallinson b  A.Manur 18
D.Brown b  A.Stansfield 0
S.Warrack b  A.Manur 1
S.Verdin Not Out  1
N.Holland ct  A.Manur 0
M.Dowloog Not Out  3

SUCC 5th XI Bowling

Player NameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
Mossie Perry3.0017117.005.67
James Bantock3.001900.006.33
Arvind Ramesh3.002200.007.33
Cameron Ponsonby3.002400.008.00
Alex Stansfield4.0032310.678.00
Jamie Poil1.001200.0012.00
Advait Manur3.00933.003.00

SUCC 5th XI Batting
Player Name RMB4s6sSRCatchesStumpingsRun outs
23w 2lb 
for 1 wickets

(19.5 overs)
Henry Groves Retired Out  50 3
Will Brisco Not Out  49 3 1
Advait Manur Not Out  15 3 1
Alex Stansfield  
Jordan McLeod   1
Arvind Ramesh  
Cameron Ponsonby  
Mossie Perry   1
James Bantock  
Jamie Poil  

Chalke Valley Bowling

Player nameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy