SUCC 5th XI v Southampton Medics on Sat 02 May 2015 at 12.00
SUCC Lost 70 runs

Match report Arriving at Wide Lane on an overcast Saturday afternoon, many members of the mixed 5's side that was put out looked like they could strongly have benefited from a rain card, with Coatsy and Bateman deserving special mention for arriving in the outfits they had worn the night before to the AU ball. Spirits were initially lifted by the news that the medics were warming up on the square and there was a good level of confidence that nobody so village could hope to scratch up many against what looked like a strong SUCC side. With the circulatory systems of the majority of the 5's still containing more tequila than a Mexican version of Champagne Charlie's it was clear this needed to be a bat first day and team morale dropped considerably after skipper Royals bungled what should have been a routine toss.

Opening bowling was provided by long-term invalid Farrant and Royals and the game got off to a reasonable start, despite some occasionally leaky bowling for Farrant. Not one to skittle a team in a friendly however, Royals brought on change bowlers Bateman and Mitchell who sportingly bowled a variety of half trackers and wide ones to the bemused medics batsmen in order to let them back into the game. The medics were very much content to play a shot a ball at this point and the pressure was on the men in the deep, so it should be perhaps of little surprise that after yet another “Bateman special” Tafiq was called into action at cow corner to make a diving catch attempt. While a very difficult catch to take, poor Tafiq had clearly been watching a little too much IPL as he acrobatically got a hand to the ball and flicked it up, only for it to carry over the boundary for a Wide Lane maximum.

By this point in the game, the SUCC bowling attack was in dire straits and there was a collective sigh when the first change were told to take a blow and replaced by fresher débutantes Jack Pethwick and Tejas Joshi. Pethwick bowled tight areas and kept the rate down admirably but by far the pick of the bowling was the very-medium Joshi who took a staggering 5 wickets for 27 off 3 overs in the quickest (and possibly only) 5fer in 5'th XI history by luring the batsmen in with a tempting array of slow short ones. A particular mention has to be given to the poor Medics #5 batsman who upon eyeing up one of these aforementioned deliveries proceeded to top edge it onto the stumps via his lid. When the dust had settled from Joshi's spell the Medics were all out for a reasonable total of 170.

Coming out to bat the general consensus within the SUCC changing rooms was that 171 was a reasonable target but not one that should pose any considerable difficulty to the veteran lineup of batsman in the side. Affairs unfortunately went they way of club icon Clough's love life when openers Coates and Roy crumbled for one apiece after both playing on. Tafiq and Alvin held on much better however and moods began to buoy before the club's very own Vin Deisel spooned one up to cover when just starting to get going. Man of the hour Tejas then came in and proceeded to hit the bowlers around before being triggered on a close run out by Mitchell, who was clearly harbouring a grudge after a much poorer bowling spell than the condemned man.

Not one to hog the limelight, skipper Royals went out and returned back very shortly after, head firmly embedded in the cusp of his right shoulder. Farrant followed and hit a quickfire 23 to shore up the side while Alvin continued to play the anchor role and keep the scoreboard ticking over. Farrant fell though and the tail soon followed with a collective strike rate lower than Jonny Coates in the Oceania toilets to leave Alivin marooned at the crease on 24.

It would be an understatement to say that the team were bitterly disappointed about the result, but like many unforeseeable moments in history, such as the second 2013 Ashes whitewash or Meghan Trainor's musical career, it is simply better to draw a line under it and pretend it never happened.

MOM – Joshi for his 5 wickets

DOD – Mitchell for signalling his own dead ball in a manner not dissimilar to a plane impression.


Southampton Medics Batting
Player name RunsMB4s6sSR
for 10 wickets
171 (30.0 overs)

SUCC 5th XI Bowling

Player NameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
Will Farrant5.0021121.004.20
Chris Royals7.0016116.002.29
Mark Mitchell4.0048224.0012.00
XY XY8.0028128.003.50
Will Bateman3.003100.0010.33
Tejas Joshi3.002755.409.00

SUCC 5th XI Batting
Player Name RMB4s6sSRCatchesStumpingsRun outs
for 10 wickets

(24.0 overs)
Roy Head Bowled  1
Jonathan Coates Bowled  1
Taufeeq Sangay Caught  16 1
Joseph Asplet Not Out  24
Tejas Joshi Run out  5
Tom Cates Bowled  0
Chris Royals Caught  0
XY XY b  (Jack Pethick) 0
Will Farrant Caught  23
Will Bateman Bowled  0
Mark Mitchell Bowled  0

Southampton Medics Bowling

Player nameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
No records to display.